I'M NOT ANGRY; I'M JUST CRAZY
November 10, 2006
© Fred Dumpling. Redistribution is prohibited.
It's a surreal memory.
The room's overexposed. The world is drenched in white.
I'm the only one in here, seen in excruciating detail.
Capturing digits on the clock,
"If I profane with my unworthiest hand—"
Stop! Cut the scene. The lines are all wrong.
I can't say these words to you;
They escape all jumbled, slurred by the poison in my blood.
What a predicament.
How do I communicate when I don't even know what I'm thinking of?
Count backwards— start from ten.
Then maybe I can breathe again. Right now you're suffocating me.
No, no, I didn't mean it. Don't turn away from me.
I've tried to put the animal to sleep.
It's what, it's what you've always wanted.
Maybe it took a part of me.
I'm not, I'm not the one you wanted.
Let's play some Scrabble once again.
That's about how much sense I'm making.
Before I lay my pieces down, the game is over.
I can't say these words to you;
They escape all jumbled, slurred by the poison in my blood.
What a predicament.
How do I communicate when I don't even know what I'm thinking of?
Count backwards— start from ten.
No, you're doing it wrong; now start again.
No, you're doing it wrong; I'm wrong— it's me.
No, no, I didn't mean it. Don't turn away from me.
I'm not angry; I'm just crazy,
and I'm not angry; I'm just crazy.
I'm not angry; I'm just crazy,
and insert cliché here because
It's not you; it's me, but it's so true.
Shouldn't even be right here with you.
I want you to know, but I can't even say,
"I lo—"
I can't say these words to you;
They escape all jumbled, slurred by the promise that I broke.
I thought I'd tried so hard,
But they were just losing game pieces that I spoke.
Not making any sense.
To tell the truth, I'm scared, so I won't blame you
If you decide to turn away from me.